


Letting go

by BrokenBirb



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Jim Gordon, First Time Bottoming, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, Jim Gordon Needs a Hug, Jim Has Issues, M/M, Oral Sex, Protective Oswald Cobblepot, Suicidal Thoughts, Top Oswald Cobblepot, he get's more
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:35:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24596854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenBirb/pseuds/BrokenBirb
Summary: Set in season 5, after Jim rescued the kids out of the dark zone.Jim has come to collect the bounty Penguin has placed on his head. But things don't always go as planned, especially not in Gotham.
Relationships: Oswald Cobblepot/Jim Gordon
Comments: 8
Kudos: 72





	Letting go

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Thank you for clicking on this story. I decided to try writing again after watching season 5 of Gotham. I haven't written anything in about four years, so I am still a little rusty. Massive writersblock, yay! Also, English isn't my first language, so please excuse any typos and/or grammar issues. If you liked this sweet, little one shot, feel free to leave kudos or a comment. It would make me really happy :)  
> Also, slight TW for suicidal thoughts ahead. Jim is in a bad place in this one, so I wanted to give you guys a heads up.  
> And now, without taking any longer, please enjoy!  
> Love, Birb

**Letting go**

When Oswald announced the bounty on Jim Gordon’s head, he knew there would be a lot of people trying to collect it. The man was known in all of Gotham, loved by some, hated by even more. He was the Golden Boy, known for his resilience, his thick-headedness, his unbreakable spirit. Killing him, destroying the enigma that was James Gordon, would not only grant one great recognition among the the various gangs but it would also reward one with 100,000 bullets, personally delivered by the Penguin himself. 

But Oswald never expected the man himself coming to collect the bounty on his own head. As they stood before each other, Oswald found himself in a predicament not often presented to him. He was speechless. At a complete lack for words, as he stared at the tall figure, looking into dull eyes. Questions flooded Oswald’s mind, overlapping, creating a wild buzz inside of his head. What was the man doing here? Was he trying to mock Oswald? Laugh in his face? No, Jim wasn’t laughing. Actually, his face was void of any emotion whatsoever. He looked empty. Tired. And Oswald didn’t know what to make of it. So he decided to take action.

Oswald straightend up, plastering his signature smile onto his face.

“James, old friend. What brings you here in these dangerous times? Have you gotten lost?”, he quipped, his voice betraying his inner turmoil, his insecruity. The other man just looked at him, his jaw tense, his gaze cold.

“I have come to collect the bounty you placed on my head.”

His voice was gravelly, like he hadn’t used it in a long time. Oswald felt a shiver run down his spine because of the lack of emotion in Jim’s voice. It was so unlike him to be so calm in Oswald’s presence. The Penguin always prided himself with being able to rile the otherwise calm detective up. It has always been easy to read Gordon. To know exactly which buttons to push to get a rise out of him. For Jim to be so emotionless felt alien to Oswald. He felt out of his own depth. 

“Oh? So you’ve heard about it. But, would you kindly explain to me, how you want to collect your own bounty? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but the bounty will only be paid if you are dead. Who will get the prize if you are unable to collect it yourself?”, he asked, his eyebrows raised, an incredulous smile on his face. “I just can’t seem to understand your logic, dear friend.”

Jim shifted lightly, shoulders tense. 

“You will kill me and give the bullets to the GCPD. They need them.” 

Oswald opened his mouth a few times, unable to form an answer. Was he trying to kid him? What has gotten into the man? He felt like he was missing something, a clue to solve this puzzle presented to him. And Oswald didn’t like it. Rage sizzled in his gut, threatening to boil to the surface and Oswald had to clench his fists to keep calm. 

“Why exactly would I do that? I could just kill you and keep the bullets to myself. What are you trying to do here, James? Are you trying to mock me?” He couldn’t keep his voice from rising. This lack of reaction from Jim left a bitter taste at the back of Oswalds tongue. Jim took a step towards him and Oswald’s whole body stiffened, preparing for a fight if it was to come. But Jim only held up one of his hands. It was shaking, betraying his own inner feelings. 

“Your bounty’s put a lot of innocent people in danger. Children. Police officers. I can’t let it happen again. Also, you are a businessman. If word got out, people would hate you even more than they do now.”

In an instant the rage inside of Oswald boiled over and with an angry scream he lunged himself at Jim, shoving the man hard. Jim stumbled back a few paces, but didn’t raise his hands to defend himself. He just looked at Oswald, his gaze empty and dull, which enraged him even more. Again Oswald shoved the other man, causing him to lose his footing. With a dull thud he landed on his butt, looking up at him, almost pleading. 

“How dare you?!”, Oswald screamed. “I am not hated! How dare you say something like that?! I should rip your tongue out, you bastard!” He hit Jim with the back of his hand, the man’s head snapping to the side. He didn’t utter a single sound, just sat there with slumped shoulders and a blank face as Oswald stood heaving, looming over the detective. 

Rage coursed like venom through his veins, coiling deep in his gut. It made him hit Jim again, the slaps almost deafeningly loud in the wide halls of his layer. He wanted to kill this man. Kill him for everything he did to Oswald. The countless betrayals, the shot to his already damaged leg. The feelings of deep love, anchored and hidden in the deepest, darkest parts of his very being, that he just couldn’t seem to shake. Oswald knew it was in his right as the selfcrowned king of Gotham to kill James Gordon. 

But he couldn’t. Not when the man would go down without a fight. Not when all life seemed to have vanished from the man’s once expressive, deep blue eyes. An empty shell sat in front of him. Broken by the endless cruelties intertwined with Gotham’s very core. 

Slowly forcing himself to calm down, Oswald stared at Jim with widened wild eyes, his hand still raised, ready to strike again. “Why aren’t you fighting back?”, he whispered, his voice hoarse from exertion. Finally those empty, oh so empty eyes met his again, and Oswald felt his heart shatter. “I’m done with fighting”, Jim answered, voice hollow. “Just end it. You have won.”

A new wave of anger crashed over Oswald, threatening to drown him in its wake. Again he lunged himself at the detective, wrapping his hands around his strong neck, straddling his narrow waist with his legs. He squeezed and Jim choked, unable to draw a breath. And still didn’t he fight back. Instead, his whole body relaxed, going limp under Oswald’s heaving form and Oswald screamed in anger and hurt. How dare he?! How dare he give up so easily? James Gordon was supposed to be the one unyielding force in Gotham, unbreakable, resilient. STRONG! 

Oswald was shaking as he stared down in Jim’s deep blue eyes. The man had given up. The man preaching about hope left, right and center, had lost his own and came to the Penguin for one last good deed. Giving his own live up, to save others. Committing suicide without having to pull the trigger himself. Gradually, Oswald loosened his grip around Jim’s neck, instead cradling the back of his head almost lovingly. 

“No.”

James stared at him bewildered, the first emotion shown on his face since he arrived at Oswald’s hideout. “What do you mean, no? This is what you wanted all along. To see me dead. Just do it.” 

Oswald shook his head and pulled his hands back, putting them on Jim’s torso, feeling the strong thud of his beating heart. 

“I won’t partake in your suicide. It would be too easy, wouldn’t it? Letting me kill you? Not having to face the shame of ending it yourself. Just… No. This would be wrong.”

Jim still stared at him, his features slowly softening. He looked defeated. Worn out. Lost. He slowly closed his eyes, a tired smile playing around his full lips. 

“Your love towards me has always made you soft.”, he murmured.

Oswald’s heart clenched at his words and he couldn’t help himself. He gently put his hand against Jim’s cheek, caressing his lower lip with his thumb. 

“And yours has kept me alive for all this time.”, he answered, before leaning down and capturing the detectives lips with his own. It wasn’t like in the movies or in the books. There were no fireworks, no sparks igniting their skin. Instead a deep calmness settled into Oswald’s soul, like he finally found something he missed his whole life. 

Jim’s lips were dry and rough and tasted like canned beans and cheap whiskey. It was the best taste Oswald ever experienced. Their lips moved in synch with each other, tongues peeking out, trying to sneak their way into the other’s mouth, a delicate dance, new and still so familiar. Oswald pushed his tongue into Jim’s mouth, tasting him, claiming him. The other man moaned softly beneath him, the sound stoking the fire starting to burn in his loins. He buried his fingers in soft blond hair, angling Jim’s head for better access. And the other man went oh so willingly. It filled Oswald with a morbid sense of satisfaction, to know he had such a strong man at his mercy. 

His other hand sneaked underneath Jim’s cheap dress shirt, scratching over hard muscle and soft, warm skin. When his fingers found a tiny, perky nipple, Jim mewled brokenly, his back involuntarily arching to seek out more of the attention. Oswald rubbed over the hard nub, drinking up every desperate sound Jim made. Lust pulsed deep in his core and he had to end the kiss before he lost his mind. Slowly leaving Jim’s soft, pliant mouth, Oswald stared down at the other man, taking in his flushed cheeks, the soft glow to his eyes. Jim met his gaze, open, vulnerable, giving him the power to do as he pleased. And oh, how Oswald wanted to please this beautiful, broken man underneath him.

To make him forget his sorrows. To wield all those broken pieces together again. 

Without breaking eye contact, Oswald pushed his knees between Jim’s legs, forcefully pushing them apart and pressing his own crotch against the other’s, where it met an unyielding hardness. Again, Jim moaned, letting his head fall back, offering up his delicate neck. Littered with purple bruises, left there by Oswald’s own hands. He leaned down again, pressing his lips to the warm skin, sucking, kissing, elicting soft moans and desperate mewls from the other man. His hands worked their way down Jim’s torso, opening up all those buttons keeping him from his price. 

When the fabric finally parted, Oswald had to stare. Hard, definded muscle, mile upon miles of soft, light skin. Again, he felt a surge of pure lust and he dove down, latching onto one of those tiny, delicate nipples, grazing it with his teeth, sucking it. Shudders wrecked Jim’s body, his fingers burying themselves in soft, black hair. Never could he have imagined that this man was so sensitive. So responsive. So willing to give all this power to Oswald. He felt delirious. His mind clouded over, and while latching onto the other nipple with his mouth, Oswald fumbled to open Jim’s trousers. To feel, to see this unforgiving hardness pressed against his abdomen. 

Again he felt out of his depth, again he felt like he was trapped in a current, trying to pull him under. But this time, Oswald let it happen. After all these years of painful pining, he had this man underneath him, was allowed to touch, to taste, to FEEL. He grabbed the rough fabric of Jim’s trousers and pulled them down, accompanied by his briefs, pulling them down and off. Jim made a surprised sound, staring wide-eyed at Oswald, shaking ever so slightly, his body rigid. For a second, the haze inside of Oswald's head cleared and he cradled Jim’s face in his hands again. 

“Do you trust me?”, he whispered, only centimeters from his wet lips. 

“With my life.”, Jim answered truthfully, his gaze open again. 

Oswald smiled and gifted him with a chaste kiss.

“Then let go. Let me take care of you.”

This time Jim initiated the kiss, soft and slow, almost shy and Oswald almost melted right then and there. Warmth bloomed in his chest and he peppered Jim’s face in soft butterfly-kisses, that made him scrunch up his nose adorably. Oswald’s hands began wandering again, caressing soft skin, finding sensitive spots. Making Jim shudder and mewl. Oswald could feel Jim’s cock throbbing against his belly, his precum leaving wet spots all over his black dress shirt. How pent up he must be, to be so hard and ready after only a bit of kissing and caressing. Oswald felt drunk of it, of the heady pleasure and power to have this effect on Jim Gordon of all people. 

Jim’s fingers scrambled for purchase in his shirt, bunching the soft fabric between his hands. His flush now went all the way down to his chest, coloring his pert nipples in a soft pink. And Oswald just couldn’t resist tasting them again. He licked and suckled, switching between those delicious nubs. And how Jim sang for him. So loud. So desperate. Oswald had to press a hand against his own throbbing arousal, squeezing the hard flesh in his hand and stifling his own sound of pleasure in Jim’s sweaty skin. 

“Oswald. Oswald!”, Jim called out for him tugging at his shirt, his deep blue eyes desperate and wet with unshed tears. “Lemme… lemme feel you. Please. I need you.” Oswald cooed softly at the man, starting to unbutton his own shirt, letting it fall to the floor in a quiet whisper of fabric. Immediately Jim’s hands were on his skin, caressing everywhere they could reach. Goosebumps kissed Oswald’s skin and he shuddered, smothering Jim in another wave of desperate kisses. Need burned low in his belly, hot and heavy. All consuming. While kissing the shivering man, Oswald spread those endlessly long legs further apart, stroking the delicate skin of his inner thighs. 

Let his fingers wander, ever so slowly, towards his softest, most hidden place. His fingers danced across his perineum, causing another wave of quiet mewls. Jim’s nails scratched across his back and Oswald hissed. The sweet pain mixed with the burning lust in his guts, clouding his mind further. “Please, Oswald. Let me feel something”, Jim whispered hot into his ear and Oswald had to bite the inside of his cheek as to not completely lose it. The pad of his index finger found the furled skin of his entrance, soft and warm, quivering underneath his touch. 

He rubbed it gently, pressing in ever so slightly, causing Jim to arch his back beautifully. Mesmerized Oswald studied his face, the thin sheen of sweat coating his forehead, the flush high on his cheeks. His plump lips, swollen and wet. He looked debauched, wrecked. And Oswald hasn’t even started fully, yet. He sat up on his haunches again, looking to the table to their right, where he cleaned his splint earlier this morning. The tub of vaseline used to moisturize the leather still stood there and Oswald reached for it, unscrewing the lid before setting the small container down again. He dipped his index and middle finger inside, coating them generously, before guiding his hand back between Jim’s spread legs. 

The other man watched him with wide eyes, his breathing shallow, his jaw tense. His fingers clung to Oswald’s clean hand, almost gripping too tight. Trying to calm him down again, Oswald squeezed his fingers back gently. “I won’t hurt you. Not anymore.” His words seemed to relax the detective and his deathgrip loosened somewhat. Waiting another moment to ensure Jim was calm again, Oswald went carefully back to circling Jim’s tight entrance with his now wet fingers. 

Jim’s breathing hitched softly, swiftly followed by a low moan as Oswald let his middle finger sink in to the second knuckle. Oswald cooed at him, bending down to kiss Jim, licking into his hot mouth before pulling away again and looking into his unfocused eyes. “Relax, darling. Let go. Let me take care of you”, he murmured, pulling his finger back before gently pushing in again. Jim’s insides gripped onto his finger, velvety soft and incredibly hot. It drove him crazy, knowing that he would soon get to bury himself in this oh so tight heat. The beautiful, strong, broken man underneath him moaned with every thrust of his finger, slowly relaxing and allowing Oswald to delve deeper. He looked so wonderfully disheveled. His cock stood hard and proud against his belly, leaking precum and Oswald couldn’t keep himself from diving down and licking the salty liquid off his skin. Jim clenched around his finger, pushing his hips towards Oswald’s lips. 

Greedily engulfing the hot throbbing length with his mouth, Oswald tried to distract Jim from the second finger, carefully pushing its way alongside the other into Jim’s body. Another broken moan fought its way out of the other’s throat, his body again back to shivering. His strong hands had buried themselves in Oswald’s hair, neither pushing nor pulling, just seeking purchase. Oswald made a satisfied sound while gently sucking on Jim’s pulsing cock. The heady smell of his arousal made Oswald’s mind fuzzy, he fought to keep in control as not to hurt Jim. He wanted the man relaxed and pleading, for Oswald to take him, to let him feel pleasure beyond belief. 

Oswald scissored his fingers inside of Jim, trying to stretch him, seeking for this tiny bundle of nerves that would make Jim see stars. He rubbed and prodded, getting to know the unique texture of Jim’s insides, when he finally found his prostate, pushing against it, making Jim scream and throw his head back. His back arched beautifully, pushing his cock deeper into Oswald’s throat. Satisfaction flooded Oswald and he rubbed over the little nub over and over, until Jim’s legs were shaking and the taste of precum coated the back of Oswald’s throat. 

“O-Oswald… More! Please, let me feel you more. I need it, please, I need you!”, Jim almost sobbed. His eyes were unfocused and wild, his plump lips open, chest heaving. Unshed tears sparkled at the corner of his eyes and Oswald fell in love all over again.

Who would have thought that a man such as Jim could be reduced to a blabbering, pleading mess in a matter of minutes. With only a few calculated movements of clever fingers and a hot, wet mouth wrapped around his throbbing length. With a wet POP! Oswald let go of the cock inside of his mouth and sat up again, his gaze burning itself into Jim’s. His fingers made wet squelching sounds as they buried themselves deep into Jim, over and over again. The powerful thighs bracketing Oswald’s hips were shaking and he knew: Jim was ready. 

Slowly retreating his fingers, Oswald fumbled a moment with his fly, before finally opening his trousers and freeing his aching cock. Precum beaded at the head and Oswald gave himself a few deliberate strokes. Jim watched with hungry eyes, a tiny, pink tongue peeking out to lick over already shiny lips. He scrambled for the tub of vaseline, coating his hand with it, before shyly reaching out. 

“Can I?”, he asked, his voice nothing more than a whisper. His hand was shaking, glistening with vaseline and Oswald gripped his wrist, guiding his hand to his throbbing member. Unsure fingers wrapped around it, stroking, exploring. Oswald let his head fall back, moaning freely at the intense pleasure flooding his veins. He felt dangerously close already, so after only a few moments of Jim stroking him, Oswald took his hand and pushed it over his head, before leaning back down and capturing Jim’s soft lips with his again. With his other hand he guided his cock towards Jim’s entrance, pushing against it, teasing. Again, Jim beautifully mewled for him, his mouth pliant and soft as Oswald kissed him. Finally breaking the kiss, Oswald locked his gaze with Jim’s. 

“Relax, darling. It will hurt a bit. But I will make it so good for you. Just keep looking into my eyes”, he crooned, before slowly starting to push in. Jim’s eyes got comically wide and his mouth fell open, his breathing shallow again. He clenched around Oswald’s intruding length, his nails burying in his skin again. Oswald lovingly cradled his face again, cooing and murmuring soft words of encouragement towards him, while steadily breaching the other man. He wanted to go slow, he needed to, but the unbearably tight heat engulfing his cock made him rapidly lose his mind. It was so soft, wet and warm inside of Jim, so perfect. Better than anything he ever felt. He clenched his teeth, forcing himself to go slow.

And finally, after what felt like an eternity, was he fully buried inside of Jim. Both of them were shaking and panting, their gazes intertwined, their bodies finally joined. Tears glistened in Jim’s dark eyes, his thighs shaking. 

“Are you okay, darling?”, Oswald asked, his voice hoarse, trying to keep it together. Jim swallowed a few times, before squeezing his eyes shut and brokenly shaking his head. “I-It’s too much. I… You are too big. I f-feel.. I feel so full. I can’t-” 

“Yes, you can, darling.”, Oswald interrupted softly, starting to roll his hips slowly. “Just let go. Feel me. Feel how I am throbbing because you feel so good. Open your eyes, darling, come on, look at me.”

Oswald softly caressed his quivering belly and ever so slowly, Jim started to relax again, slowly opening his eyes and looking up at him. Oswald smiled gently, bending down, kissing the wrecked man, before pulling out and pushing in again. 

Jim’s breathing hitched, but there seemed to be no real pain, so Oswald set a slow rhythm, fucking into Jim with steady strokes. With every movement of his hips, the other man relaxed further, moans again freely flowing out of his mouth. And again Oswald felt mesmerized. At how beautiful the detective was, how well he responded to every push and pull. At one point, strong thighs wrapped around Oswald’s waist, pulling him closer and Jim started to meet his thrusts. 

They moved in perfect synch with each other, the room around them filled with the wet sounds of their skin slapping against each other, their shared moans, the hot kisses they shared. The pure pleasure pounding through Oswald’s veins clouded his mind and he knew he wouldn’t last much longer. So he changed the angle and the pace of his thrusts, aiming for Jim’s sweet spot, wanting to make him sing again. A scream ripped through the air, Jim’s back arching almost painfully, and Oswald knew he had found it. He pushed harder and faster, his own desperate moans intertwining with Jim’s. 

Strong hands clenched around his shoulders and Jim looked at him with wild eyes. Tears ran down his pink cheeks and Oswald needed to kiss him. “You are so good, Jim. You feel incredible. How well you take me.”, he panted afterwards and was rewarded with a shudder wracking through Jim’s whole body. “I’m close, Oswald. So- so close… Please”, the blond sobbed and Oswald increased the speed of his thrusts again, making the other scream out in pure pleasure. He wanted to make him come, wanted to see how he shattered beneath him. Wanted to burn the image into his memory, so he could savour it in lonely nights to come.

The closer Jim got, the louder got his voice, his nails scratching over Oswald’s, leaving burning pain in their wake. More tears streamed down his face and he desperately tried to form words. But the only thing that came out were gargled chants of Oswald’s name. 

And then, as if time was stopped, his whole body went rigid, his eyes huge and unfocused. He seemed to tether at the edge, before finally tumbling over it, reaching his climax with a silent scream. Creamy white erupted out of his throbbing cock, coating their bellies with his release. He clenched wildly around Oswald, pulling him with Jim underneath a roaring current of pleasure, lust and satisfaction. They fell together, embracing each other, staring into each other’s eyes. 

Afterwards, Oswald didn’t know for how long they lay there. Listening to their shared breaths, their hearts beating in synch. Jim’s was still wrecked by the aftershocks as Oswald pulled out, his gaze far away. Oswald lay down next to him, pulling the man into his arms, nuzzling his face and softly cooing to him. Finally Jim calmed somewhat, raising his face, his expression unreadable. 

“Are you okay, darling? Did I hurt you?”, Oswald asked, voice soft, almost purring. He was filled with content, a warm, fuzzy feeling in his belly. Jim only shook his head, burying his face in Oswald’s neck, inhaling deeply. 

“This… was my first time with a man.”

“Do you regret it?” 

“No.”

Jim’s answered firmly, despite his still shaking form. Oswald smiled gently and kissed the top of his head. 

“I’m glad. Look at me please.”

Jim raised his head again, blinking tiredly at Oswald. His face was cradled in warm hands and Oswald met his gaze firmly.

“You will never, EVER, try to pull a stunt like that again, do you hear me? It is okay to let go sometimes, but not like that!”, he growled, his hurt and anger from before clouding his jade eyes. Jim hesitated for a moment, before haltingly nodding. He opened his mouth, likely to spill out some stupid excuse, but Oswald interrupted him. “I won’t let you destroy yourself. Not when you just allowed me to have you in my arms. Let me take care of you. Let us fight, side by side. We are stronger together. Together, we can rebuild Gotham again.” 

Jim looked at Oswald, his emotions masked, but ever so slowly, a small smile spread across his swollen lips. He snuggled closer to the Penguin again, nuzzling his face against his neck. His hand pressed against his chest, right over Oswald’s beating heart. 

“Together”, he whispered, before placing a soft kiss to Oswald’s lips. 


End file.
